Monster Adoption Agency

The weekend passed without a rigorous training session for the boy - though I think we are close to being ready. After all, he does know how. As the MonkeyFish himself says, "I make water in the potty and I get a dot."

The candy dot is not a part of the arrangement. He's just terribly good at negotiations.

My energies were being spent (and I do mean spent!) elsewhere.

I had a small army of Monsters to create.

Have I mentioned that I don't sew? I don't. I only pretend I know how. So creating a small army of monsters was hazardous to my sanity. During another bleary night of sewing buttons, I turned to Bill. "How do I get myself into these things?" He smiled knowingly. And then, nights later as I stuffed my 100th leg, I turned to Bill (who was benevolently stuffing legs with me) and said, "Seriously. How do I get myself into these things?!"

He laughed.

I looked him over with a suspicious eye.

"I have a suspicion that you knew exactly what I was getting into when I presented this crazy idea to you."

He grinned. "Well, it's not as though there weren't a pattern."

It's true. I have big ideas. Large concepts that I commit myself to accomplishing without considering all the many, many, manymany steps it takes to get there. And I usually give myself two weeks to complete a three month job.

I think Bill is on to me.

But, why a small army of monsters, you might ask?

 (Please ignore my embarrassing sign. My Graphic Designer was busy with deadlines of his own.)

Because.

Ali, Megan and I took part in a boutique held in Eagle Mountain. It was actually a baby contest, and the hosts decided to have a boutique to occupy the time while the contestant's parents were waiting for the judges to validate the cuteness of their offspring.

Speaking of award-winning cuteness. Check out this contender.



Second place in his division. We're pretty sure the first place winner tipped the judges.

Proud mommy with her prize loot:

I adore that book.

Ali sold homemade binky leashes and darling double-thick burp rags. Megan sold baby headbands and flower accessories, magnets, and wooden accents.



I sold Monsters.

One of these things is not like the other?


Correction. I tried to sell monsters. The event was largely unsuccessful. In chatting with other venders, we discovered that we were not the only ones who had little success. Those in attendance were young mothers with several children clinging to their shirts hoping their babies would earn their keep and win something for their cuteness. They weren't there to spend.

But I was there with my two sisters, and so we had a great time!

I also presented a little of this for consideration:


My Mom came to check things out (and see her darling award-winning grandson). She leaned in and said to me, "I am no good at this kind of retail. I just get too involved."

Yes. Yes indeed.

My monsters caught the fancy of several children. Each time one of them would come and handle one of the monsters with their sticky fingers (they were handing out free candy sticks! Bad idea! Bad!) and would pull on the poor fellow's legs, tug on his ears, poke and prod, I would hover, ready to rescue. And when the uncaring child would roughly fling the monster back into the pile (every time they did this. It was a bizarre trend) I would cringe.

They weren't children looking at a stuffed toy. They were bullies harrassing my friends!

(A few of them even had the nerve to say, "We can just make these at home.")


(Well, sure. But where my monsters offer protection, yours will be souleless counterfiets who will likely mutiny and eat you in your sleep. Hack-monsters are fickle like that.)

But there were even more who picked them up, carefully turned them in their hands, and fell in love with them the way only children can. I had to try very hard to not just give them away to these children.


So four Monsters found friends to love them, and the rest came home with me. The MonkeyFish was overcome with joy over the sheer number of them.

(this is his take on 'make a monster face')

And this one was promptly addopted by the hummingbird.


They chose each other. The little guy leapt at her, and she promptly drooled on him, binding the contract.

I have a house full of sad, homeless monsters. The mournful wails they make at night are terrible! Poor guys. But we'll gry again to place them - Ali and I are going to try another boutique the day after Megan's wedding.

How do I get myself into these things?


5 comments:

Sasha said...

I'll buy a monster from you Stepper! Name your price and tell me if you have pay pal! :)
And i'll be sure to love and treasure it as all monsters deserve (while keeping an eye on any mischief too)!

Guh said...

seriously! we need prices!

Nae said...

Where will this next boutique be? And when? I would SO love to come and browse through your cuddley wares. :) And I'd love to see more of Ali's things too!

That Girl said...

You sell them on Etsy, silly girl. Or to your friend. ME.

How much?

Cheryl said...

Okay, off-topic from the monster thread, but how on earth do you get your baby to sit like that? She's younger than my boy and he will NOT SIT STILL no matter what I do! He can sit! I have photographic proof... but he just won't! He's far too busy to just sit. Makes me nuts! I'm afraid the doc is gonna yell at me next week! :P