What would you-a-done?

Sometimes when Bill gets really jazzed about something at school, he comes home all animated and fast-talky and he says some really zany things.

Like "Hey, Stepper - what is your gut reaction to the idea of me going to New York for six weeks next summer to study design in this amazing workshop opportunity?"

Well. I had so many gut reactions to that question that I knew if I opened my mouth, a sound akin to a dying ostrich would probably come out. Continuously. For several minutes.

So I just stood there looking at him.

He started guessing at my possible reservations, and began offering possible solutions.

"What if we could raise the money through the AIGA to send a group of us there?"

"...Such a great opportunity."

"...after my Summer Block of classes was over."

"...would really benefit my portfolio."

"...work overtime beforehand to make up what I'd miss at work."

I wanted to just say yes. I wanted to be the cool wife and I wanted to say, Dude! Go for it! I didn't want to be thinking, Oh. Sure. Leave your wife and children for SIX WEEKS to go on some great adventure (that involves hotels!) and have this amazing artistic experience while I'm home having an amazing laundry experience.

...Mostly, I just want to come, too. I love New York.

But me and the kids? We spell DISTRACTION.  On account of our awesomeness.

The idea isn't out. It's not in, but it's not out.

But it got me thinking. Ladies? What would you a-done?


Kristen said...

First of all, I would have been jealous because I love NYC, too, and have even lived there for 5 months.

Not sure... I would probably agree eventually, after making him promise things like taking me on a trip to a beach somewhere, doing the dishes for a month once he gets home, or something along those lines.

Good luck with the decision! I love when you said "awesome laundry experience". Made me laugh.

Hel said...

I'm sure I would have reacted EXACTLY how you did. The sound of the ostrich made me laugh.... all I could think as soon as you mentioned it was 6 weeks - 3 kids - summer. ICK!!! It would take some real convincing or a lot of back massages for me to become comfortable with an idea like that.

Anonymous said...

6 weeks is a long time! Especially with 3 kiddos! I don't think I could do it with just two. Good luck on your decision.. it wouldn't be too hard for me... other opportunities that don't involve leaving your family for 6 weeks will come I'm sure!

Tamsin said...

Me? Take a deep breath and say "YES!"

Then call in reinforcements and start planning a long weekend so you could go and join him. At a hotel. In NYC.

Charms said...

This is a toughie. The longest Mac ever "left"me was for four weeks straight (international work trip) and by the end I was ready to throw myself off a cliff. And I was "kidless" at the time--just pregnant!

Have a fast, say some prayers and I'm sure you two will make the right decision.

Jeff and Ari said...

Oh man ... I would struggle so much! I cry when Jeff leaves on a 4 day business trip. Seriously. (And I used to leave for work all the time!). But in the end, I would send him. I always look at those things as "a huge career opportunity ... and something we are investing in for the future." And sometimes that calls for huge sacrifice and big adventure. And yes, buy a ticket for you to join him to see the city. Alone. It would be very, very romantic.

Danyelle said...

When Kevin and I were engaged, he lived in Washington and I lived here. For six months. It was not fun. He has been away from me only few times one of which was for 3 days when I was literally due to have Anderson the 2nd day he was gone and the yearly father and sons overnighter. Coming from someone who has done it for a long time (childless) the first part is fun- long distance relationship, best friend phone conversations all night long- fun. But after that, the pits. Deepest darkest pits. And with kids?! Not even the first part would be fun for me. Tell him to pray about it and read scriptures and secretly stick little things in his scriptures that will persaude him to pass on the adventure.
Then go to the beach. Together. With the kids.

craftyashley said...

I would have yelled NO! He's not allowed to go to NYC without me, much less for that long. He has three kids too, it's not just my responsibility. Plus I'm the super jealous type anyway. I know I would be miserable the entire time and probably resent him for leaving.

Grandpa Rusty said...

On the other hand, assuming the finances of it all make any sense for the overall benefits, you do have loving family around to help when your insanity starts to reach dangerous levels. Just saying...

*gu* said...

My first question is always: "Do I have to go?"

When the answer is 'no' then I breathe a sigh of relief and thank the universe for letting aaron go get his travel on while I get to stay home...

but that IS a REALLY long time to be apart...
and I don't have kids
and i hate traveling
and i REALLY hate hotels,


Briana said...

I'm a big believer in doing everything in your power to help encourage and support the success of your spouse. I would say, "HECK YES! Go for it, make us proud!" What an opportunity:) Then perhaps go find a dark corner to cry in (kidding, mostly).
Yes it would be hard but in the big scheme of things, it's only 6 weeks. (Did I just say only?!) Yes I did.
You have your awesome family to support and help you and the Stepper I know has crazy strength and determination--anything is possible for her. Plus, you could plan a trip out to see him, just you, for a much needed break.