Tips for Spring

If you live anywhere near me, there's a chance you are thinking that Spring has arrived - even if briefly - and are unable to keep your mind away from possible camping trips, walks around the 'hood, and, of course, the all important SPRING CLEANING, FIRST GARDENING and SEASON-CHANGE DECORATING of the year.

Well, seeing as how I'm the expert on all three, I thought I'd bestow upon you some sage advice that may help steer you in the right direction before you undertake any of these projects.

I know, my benevolence sometimes amazes even me.

STEPPER'S GUIDE TO SPRING

1. SPRING CLEANING

• You should spring clean your house. No, really. You should. 
• You should probably make a detailed list of all the chores that a proper Spring Cleaning entails. Otherwise, your red-haired, lazy teenage daughter (cough) might think that 'clean out the cupboard' might just mean 'eat all the chips'. Also - feels good to check things off a list. Very Spring Cleany.
• Don't use Ammonia and a toothbrush to clean the baseboards. You might fall asleep half way through. Trust me.

2.  FIRST GARDENING

• I've found that the very best way to make sure that your garden doesn't become overrun with weeds is to not plant a garden in the first place.
• It might be a good plan to have a clear idea of what weeds look like before you start your therapeutic yanking. Because sometimes you think a tulip upstart is a weed.

3. SEASON-CHANGE DECORATING

• You may have to actually hide the huge orange geometric-patterned pillows that your husband thinks are cool to keep them off the couch.
• Your husband may, in turn, hide your green and purple couch pillows. Just sayin'.

Alright, now who else is up for a little rain storm?

Anyone?

Anyone?